It's Just Out Of Reach!!!

I feel like my arm is stretched out and my fingertips are barely grazing my dreams!!! Right now I'm kinda feeling like I will never get there. I'm feeling like I should just give up. I'm feeling like everybody is laughing at me and saying what a joke I am. I feel defeated even though I have barely begun the race.

It's times like these when I wish the Lord would come and sit beside me and tell me the truth!!! Lol. Am I going to fail??? Now why would He tell me that I was going to fail? He wouldn't because then I would never try!! Lol.

I'm feeling overwhelmed! I'm feeling panicked!! I'm feeling paralyzed!!! Sooo much to do!!! Never enough time or energy!!! I need some encouragement! I'm feeling like the work I am doing is all to spoil. Is it no good? Is it a waste of my time? I hate wasting time! I have wasted enough of my life on petty things! I want to rise above!!!

I just refuse to believe that I will live an average life! My heart yearns for more! I want to do great things and be a part of great things! But... Sometimes I get discouraged and I want to crawl in a hole somewhere and cry. I get to where I stop talking to everybody. I don't wanna be that girl anymore!!!

Lord help!!!

Getting Back On Track

I don't remember exactly when now but I had a schedule at one time. I had routines. Everything was planned and on paper. Everything down to phone call time with friends. I was not military strict with my time. I was flexible. But everything ran so smooth... I want to get that back!!! BUT there are a few differences this time around. Number One is now I have a third baby. Kids in school is another thing to plan around. Husband has different work schedule. It's just all around different.

Ohhhh there is always sooo much to do and never enough time to do it. I want to reread "A Woman After God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George! Or even better yet take her training course. I wish!!! I want to be like the Proverbs 31 Woman!!! Fo sho fo sho!!! Lol

I had everything so organized and now I don't know where anything is. I want to get back on track! Maybe I need another "War Week"! Something else from Allison LaMarr! But I'm not even sure where to start! I'm so ashamed of myself for letting it get this way. But I'm also upset because I'm still young but my body feels so old. Just cooking dinner can make my back go into spasms. I'm gonna try not to complain. Life is good. God is Great!

I know One thing is true though. If I fail to plan then I have planned to fail! And I need to plan my work and work my plan! So tonight shall be the night to start working on getting my life back on track. While my husband is away training. So I have from tonight all the way through till this Friday to get some type of plan. I know that sounds good and all but with a 6 year old, 4 year old, and almost 6 month old to tend to I shall be busy to say the least!!!

But I wouldn't trade it for the world!!! So dear Lord would You please help me!!! Whether it be with the Bible or Elizabeth George or Allison LaMarr or whoever or whatever. Please Lord HELP!!! Amen

The Clock is Ticking

Oh Lord please help me!!! I set a goal today... I have given myself almost 3 years to have my business up and running and fully functional and operational. I am going crazy now worried sick about getting stuff together. I have so many ideas swirling around in my head!!! I have tried to get stuff down on paper but on paper it's just not as awesome as it is in my head.

I'm so afraid that none of my ideas are marketable!!! Am I worthy enough for the competition around here??? What ideas should I stick with??? What ideas should I trash??? Will my business actually be profitable??? Is there really room for me to open up shop??? WILL I FAIL???

Success is my only option!!! I pray that God guides me in His direction!!! I need His help!!! And ya know what?! If God does not want me to do this then I will move on but if it is in God's will I sure hope He starts giving me some answers now!!! Lol

Like... What should my product or service be??? Just stick with photography??? Just stick with the boutique??? Event planning??? Ball room dancing fundraisers??? Park playground on business property??? What about Tyyanduh Inc??? My other business ideas??? All of my ideas??? None of them??? Where to locate my business??? Who to hire??? Vendors to use??? Stay in Bogalusa??? Go to Mississippi??? Fowl River???

UHG!!! Soooo many questions that need to be answered! Sooo many decisions that need to be made! Sooo many risks to take!

AND!!! I have not kept up with my Allison LaMarr's 90 day transformation... I need to get a business plan together but how in the world can I do that when I don't have answers to questions. That's my problem!!! I am horrible at finishing things because I'm horrible at making decisions!!! Sooo I need to get on the ball and start making some decisions!!! It would be nice if I could do a marketing analysis on whether my business is even wanted...